Marriage is under attack in our society. More frequently couples are opting for cohabitation and other less permanent forms of milking a relationship of all the things that make one feel good without any obligation to sacrifice for the other. Ironically homosexuals are fighting the loudest for marriage.
There is obviously a spiritual battle going on to destroy God’s gift of marriage. Why? Marriage reflects God’s triune nature of the trinity in which love is perfected in three who are one. Man and woman become one flesh in a covenant with God and each other. In the covenant of marriage, love and grace compliment each other to bring about unity. God is pleased with unity. There is no chance for unity until selfishness has been crucified. A part of each person must die before love comes alive in the relationship, this is the part that prioritizes my feelings, my interests, myself above the union. The devil hates unity. He is always at work to breed strife and division, along with hatred and resentment. Divorce severs the closest bond one human can have with another, and it shatters the emotional and relational health of all parties involved. Many use divorce as revenge on their spouses. Some even go so far as plundering the other just to gloat in the spoils. It is never more obvious than this the person is a mere dagar the enemy uses to stab his/her spouse in the back. This may leave one with a sense of victory, but no one wins in a divorce regardless what the financial outcome may be.
Another reason Satan hates marriage is because it was created by God to foreshadow Christ’s relationship with the church, the bride of Christ. Marriage represents Jesus perfect love for us. “Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish… For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it just as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body. ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.’ This mystery is profound, and I am saying it refers to Christ and the church. (Ephesians 5:25-27, 29-32 ESV)”
Marriage is meant to teach us grace, giving the other what he needs the most when he deserves it the least. This requires the sacrifice of many things especially pride. Grace, sacrifice and the death of pride create an environment for new life to come forth, but the enemy seeks to bring death and destruction.
Infatuation floods one with passionate feelings while giving a false sense of intimacy.It occurs in the initial stages of a relationship, which is actually the most unstable and vulnerable time of a relationship. The pseudo-intimacy it gives with along with the heightened emotions produces excitement that masks the reality of the shallow nature of the relationship. This is can make a woman say she’s found “the one” when he may actually be married to someone else. It doesn’t make sense, but it feels right. Most every movie displays this initial time when two people “fall in love” and have magical feelings toward each other. Repeated exposure to TV shows, movies and books with this same story line cause us to lust for the excitement and the mystery of the unknown which has long since gone by the wayside in any relationship that has lasted very long. Lust for the rush of infatuation causes many to stray from healthy marriages for temporary feelings and the emotional sensations of newness. All the while innocent children pay the tab for our selfish pursuits of passion.
We Can Fire Back
Don’t believe the lie culture repeatedly feeds us, true love is something I blindly fall into. Love is not a feeling, but lust is and we are all vulnerable to it. Love places another’s needs above my own. Lust is all about how you make me feel. Love impacts my emotions but is not controlled by them. Love involves commitment, and stands the test of time.
Don’t believe the lie, my true love will make me happy. Happiness is not derived from my relationship with my spouse. It comes from a fulfilling relationship with God. It produces a healthy love for myself. Then flows through me and is given as a gift to my spouse and children unconditionally – the same way I receive it. If I cannot be happy in my current relationship I must first look within rather than pointing the finger at my spouse or looking for another one. God is my source of happiness and fulfillment, not my spouse, not someone I’m dating or wish I was dating. God alone is able to supply all my needs according to his riches and glory through Christ (Phil. 4:19).
Believe the truth. God can make a way where there seems to be no way. He can take two lives that have grown apart, and knit them together again. We don’t put our hope in our spouses ability to change. We put our hope in God who can heal us both with his love and cause our marriages not only to survive, but to thrive. God was there when we took our vows. He was there when we brought each new life he made into this world. He knows about our families. He knows how we’ve hurt each other, and through his power we can begin again. We don’t trust in our ability to make our marriages work. We trust in his ability, because he never fails. The same power that raised Christ from the dead dwells inside us as believers, and we can intercede for our marriages. Believing that God can do more than resurrect a dead marriage. He can give us a whole new marriage with two people dependent upon him to meet their needs and then giving generously with sacrificial love to one another. This is a marriage filled with life and love that reflects Christ’s relationship with the church.